Harriet Goes To The Shooting Range
Noticing that MI6 were happily a little quiet mission-wise and ever mindful of their training requirements, The Boss arranged for the three Stuffy Shirts to attend their regular shooting practice together at the MI6 range. Nicky, Emily, and Harriet arrived at the familiar facility, the scent of gun oil and the sharp cracks of gunfire already filling the air.
They each took their designated lanes. Soon, the rhythmic whistling of their weapons echoed through the range. It quickly became apparent that all three (3) agents were highly proficient. Their shots were tight, disciplined, and consistently found their mark on the targets downrange. Harriet demonstrated an impressive skill, her groupings remarkably tight and centred.
As the trio continued their practice, Nicky Parsons noticed a man in a nearby lane not-so-subtly watching Harriet. He seemed more interested in Harriet than in his own target.
Once their session concluded and the targets were retrieved, Nicky casually made her way to Harriet's lane. She examined Harriet's target, noting the impressive cluster of shots in the bullseye. Carefully detaching the paper target, Nicky then approached the man who had been observing Harriet.
Standing beside him, Nicky held up Harriet's target for him to see, the neat bullet holes speaking volumes of the accuracy of the shooter.
"Do you really think you want her telephone number?" Nicky asked, her tone deceptively mild.
The man's eyes widened slightly as he took in the precision of Harriet's shooting. He glanced from the target back to Nicky, a sudden look of apprehension replaced his earlier interest.
"Ah ... well," the prospective suitor stammered, glancing nervously towards the exit. "I ... I have got to go. I do not want to miss my train."
Her voice still calm, but with an underlying firmness, Nicky agreed: "No. You do not want to miss your train."
The man quickly gathered his belongings and made a hasty retreat from the shooting range. For a moment Nicky watched the prospective suitor depart, before rejoining Emily and Harriet, both of whom were seemingly oblivious to the brief exchange.
Harrietville Record Shop
Roughly six (6) weeks later, Harriet approached Nicky and Emily during their work morning tea break and invited the Stuffy Shirts to socialise in Harrietville again.
“A cross town train ride will be required, ladies. I propose this Saturday the Stuffy Shirts go to a Harrietville record shop and listen to a record or three in the listening booths, then have tea and muffins at a cafeteria afterwards.”
Emily: Excellent idea.
Nicky: Consider your offer accepted, Miss Harriet.
Saturday arrived and when the Stuffy Shirts got together in Harrietville, Harriet asked her colleagues:
“When you go out socialising, like we are now, do you ladies take your work handbag with you? The small one that fits in your coat pocket?”
Nicky: Yes, always.
Emily: Definitely.
The Stuffy Shirts then proceeded to the record store and started listening to music in individual listening booths.
Iron Curtain Bad Guy Jazz Fan
Unbeknown to Nicky and Emily, Harriet had been surveilling a male who attended the record shop from time to time. The intelligence that routinely crossed her work desk lead Harriet to believe that her neighbourhood had been infiltrated by an Iron Curtain Bad Guy and this one had a taste for the latest jazz releases. He also seemed to like the buzz in the record store on a Saturday.
About 10 minutes into the Stuffy Shirts finding their jazz listening groove, the Iron Curtain Bad Guy jazz fan arrived. Initially all was calm, then something seemed to agitate the target Harriet was surveilling. He was getting rather aggressive with a Mr 20Something and the situation did not seem likely to diffuse any time soon.
Harriet tapped her Stuffy Shirt colleagues and said to them: “Ladies, find your work handbags immediately or hit the floor.”
As the Iron Curtain Bad Guy produced a firearm and pointed it at Mr 20Something, Harriet drew her firearm and put her first round in his hand holding the firearm. Her second round was in his chest and her third round was in his left calf. Mr Iron Curtain Bad Guy fell to the floor immediately.
Emily had made her way to the front door of the store and closed it.
Nicky Parsons proceeded to the now fallen Bad Guy and placed her handcuffs on him behind his back. She then announced to the store: “We are all going to wait here until the authorities arrive.”
Harriet was already talking to the record store staff about using their telephone. She had no trouble calling MI6 and telling them to get a collection team to the record store immediately.
MI6 Arrive
Not 10 minutes passed before the MI6 team arrived to take over from the Stuffy Shirts.
One of the MI6 agents had a conversation with Mr 20Something about the excitement in the record shop. Mr 20 Something insisted the argument with the Iron Curtain Bad Guy was over a record, the recent Donald Byrd album release, The Cat Walk. Mr 20Something had the last copy the store had in stock in his hand and the apparently short-tempered and impatient Iron Curtain Bad Guy wanted it. He did not seem to want to wait until the store obtained more stock of the record.
The MI6 agent assured Mr 20Something the threat from the agitated and impatient Iron Curtain Bad Guy had been neutralised and he would no longer be a problem for Mr 20Something. The authorities would relocate and entertain the troublemaker.
Mr 20Something did not impress the MI6 agent as a problem and the shock of having a gun drawn on him seemed to be dissipating, Insisting he was fine, Mr 20Something persuaded the MI6 agent to allow him to go about his business again, without any MI6 companionship.
During the motor vehicle ride back to MI6, the agents reminded the Iron Curtain Bad Guy it was an argument over a jazz record that lead to his capture. They also told him he would get medical treatment at MI6 headquarters. He was not being taken to a hospital or medical facility.
Once back at MI6 headquarters, a doctor treated the gunshot wounds of the short-tempered Iron Curtain Bad Guy, while agents interviewed him.
MI6 Agent: “You pulled a gun on a guy in a record shop. Be grateful we are giving you any medical treatment at all and that is before we get to your plans to poison our water supply. Start talking in a helpful way or your future will be rather painful.”
Tea and Muffins
Nicky: I think tea and muffins are on you, Miss Harriet. It seems you have a story to tell us.
Harriet: Let us make our escape while our colleagues are dealing with the Bad Guy.
Emily: Lead the way, Hot Shot.
Once the Stuffy Shirts were settled in their Harrietville cafeteria and comforted by their ever reliable tea and muffins, Harriet began to expand upon the brevity of her socialising invitation.
“Saturday morning and the Stuffy Shirts listening to jazz records, followed by tea and muffins, what was not to like? So I extended an invitation to you. Happily you accepted.
What I did not tell you was the intelligence that had crossed my desk about our rowdy, not so friendly Iron Curtain Bad Guy friend. I knew he came into the record store from time to time. I had seen him there more than once on a Saturday. But he did not do anything to otherwise draw attention to himself.
My plan was if anything happened this morning, we would be there and would be able to handle it.
Emily: Some impressive assumptions on your part there, Miss Harriet.
Nicky: And some sharp shooting.
Harriet: The situation was handled and now we are having tea and muffins.
Emily: How rude of the Iron Curtain guy, interrupting my listening to a jazz album.
Nicky: Clearly his parents need to teach him some good manners.
Harriet: We can listen to the music another day. It is probably not a good idea to go back to that record shop today.
Nicky: There are tea and muffins here that require my attention.
Emily: Jazz listening has been adjourned.
Emily continued: “Miss Harriet, Harrietville has now been infiltrated by the Iron Curtain Bad Guys. You are now in the same club as Nicky and I. If you come to our neighbourhood, we can show you the Minor Key Café, which is near where Nicky killed a dangerous Iron Curtain assassin one Saturday morning, during her breakfast.”
Nicky: And the Bratwurst Café, where Emily put fabric softener in the pot of tea of two (2) Soviet Bad Guys, as an effective disabling tool. Emily paid for the pot of tea. She was not completely inconsiderate.
Emily: The ambience of your neighbourhood is now not so different to ours.
Harriet: An Iron Curtain Bad Guy sullying the ambiance of a record shop is not quite a final breakfast time interlude or a pot of tea with extras, but it is certainly staking a claim for being filed under Colourful, rather than Stuffy.
Nicky: So, we are agreed, The Stuffy Shirts live in colourful neighbourhoods.
Emily: I am keen to return for some more jazz listening.
Nicky: And tea and muffins.
Emily: Of course.
Harriet: Enjoy your tea and muffins, ladies. We have done our work for the day.
Nicky: On a Saturday, no less.
Emily: We have some solid relaxing to do. Another pot of tea will be required.
Nicky: Indeed.
Harriet: And some more muffins.
Monday Morning
Monday morning arrived and so did Emily Abernathy at the apartment of Nicky Parsons. They had arranged to go to work together. Once Emily was inside the apartment of Nicky Parsons, Nicky spoke to Emily:
“I propose a detour on the way to work this morning.”
Emily: An adventure before work. The record shop excitement of last Saturday was not enough for you?
Nicky: Think of it more of a tradition, rather than an adventure. Although it involves a record shop.
Emily: Never a dull moment with you, Miss Parsons.
Nicky: There is a record shop nearby that hopefully will have what I want.
Emily: Lead the way, Miss Parsons.
In less than ten (10) minutes, the agents were in a record store not far from the home of Nicky Parsons. Nicky located a copy of the recent Donald Byrd album release The Cat Walk and took it to the service counter.
Emily was amused, but said nothing.
At the service counter Nicky asked the female store attendant if they had something in the nature of a blank card that could accompany the album. It was planned to be a gift.
The female store attendant said: “I have just what you are looking for,” and produced a delightful blank gift card.
Nicky produced a pen from her handbag and wrote on the card:
• Number 1, with a Bullet.
Emily interrupted her laughter to comment to Nicky: “Delightful.”
Nicky paid for the record and thanked the female store attendant for her assistance.
The Store Attendant: Have a nice day, ladies.
Nicky and Emily in reply: Have a nice day.
Nicky: Now we can go to work and pay a visit to Harriet.
Still amused Emily: “To the train station.”
MI6 Headquarters
Once at work, the two agents went straight to the office of Harriet and had a closed- door meeting with her.
Nicky: Agent Harriet, It seems we have something of a tradition in our team, and with that in mind, I have a gift for you.
Nicky then gave the recent Donald Byrd album release The Cat Walk to Harriet and also the accompanying gift card.
Harriet was surprised and grateful to receive the record.
Then she turned her attention to the gift card: When she read “Number 1, with a Bullet.”, she chuckled loudly.
Harriet: Three bullets, Agent Parsons.
Emily: And they were all hits.
Harriet “You have interesting traditions, Agent Parsons. I love it.”
Nicky: As much as I would like to spend the rest of the day with you ladies, we had better go and do some work.
Emily: Agent Parsons, This detour this morning has been delightful.
As Nicky Parsons opened the door to the office of Agent Harriet, she was greeted by the secretary to the Boss.
Secretary: Oh, good. The Boss wants to see the three of you now.
Emily to The Secretary: Lead the way.
Five minutes later the Stuffy Shirts were seated in the office of the Boss.
The Boss: Have you ladies thought of spending your not working time not working?
Nicky Parsons: The Bad Guys are very inconsiderate of our working hours.
Emily Abernathy: It is extremely inconsiderate of them.
The Boss: Very creative surveillance, Agent Harriet. In a record shop. Good planning, Agent Harriet and very good shooting.
The Boss: "I have a proposition for the three of you. You have the day off tomorrow, in recognition of your penchant for working after hours. I do not have an errand for you. This is a straight day off. Whether you spend it together or alone is up to you.
Of course, you could reject my offer and come in to work.
If you decide to take up my offer of a day off, hopefully the bad guys will leave you alone for the day."
Emily: A day off, tomorrow?
Nicky: For Queen and Country.
The Boss: Indeed, Agent Parsons. I invite the three of you to take the day off tomorrow, for Queen and Country.
The Stuffy Shirts in unison: For Queen and Country.
The Boss: Thank you, ladies. Enjoy your day.
The Stuffy Shirts then left the office of the Boss and went to the office of Nicky Parsons.
Harriet: Today has been a day of surprises. Pleasant surprises.
Emily: Feel like catching a cross town train and spending the morning in our neighbourhood?
Nicky Parsons: I can recommend breakfast at the Minor Key Café, without the killing. We can safely stick to the food.
Emily: And the pots of tea.
Nicky: We can plan the rest of our day over breakfast.
Emily: Breakfast at the Minor Key Café at 8:00 am?
Harriet: Breakfast at the Minor Key Café at 8:00 am.
Nicky: Excellent.
Emily: Splendid.
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