Make It Look Routine

 M1 was not sure when he first noticed Miss Natasha but she kept sparking his interest as he overheard bits of conversation from her, when their paths intersected at morning tea and lunch breaks and the occasional MI6 corridor pass. Something seemed out of place about the conversation excerpts he overheard from her.

In those conversation excerpts, M1 thought he heard Miss Natasha show an occasional use of terms more at home behind the Soviet Iron Curtain. He also thought those conversation excerpts showed Miss Natasha with a faint, almost imperceptible accent of the Soviet variety. However, he conceded he was not paying close attention to her or her conversation.

After about six (6) weeks of what he thought was unusual conversation excerpts, he decided to approach Agent Nicky Parsons to share his thoughts about Miss Natasha with her and run his plan by Agent Parsons.

Fortunately for M1, Agent Parsons was both in her office when he called on her and she had some time to speak with him. When M1 took a seat in her office, she closed the door to her office. The essence of the plan was for M1 to attempt to be a date for Miss Natasha and see if that friendship revealed any unusual behaviour.

Agent Parson then telephoned Agent Harriet and asked her to come to her office immediately. Agent Harriet replied she had nothing pressing to do at that time, so she would immediately proceed to the office of Nicky Parsons.

When Agent Harriet arrived at her office, Nicky Parsons again closed the door and gave Harriet an overview of the discussion with M1.

Parsons: Agent Harriet, I propose that you give our colleague, M1, here, a class or 3 from MI6 on how to be an undercover agent date. Are you interested? Do you have any thoughts?

Harriet: Boring MI6 textbook stuff, Agent Parsons?

Parsons: Indeed. But M1 will learn from that text book what he might expect from that date situation and how to keep the team and MI6 informed.

Harriet: Are we pre-planning for a mission?

Parsons: Call it preparation.

Harriet: Sure. No problems.

Parsons: Looks like school is in for you, M1. Agent Harriet can tell you shortly, after she has sorted out her rough lesson plan, the details of those private lessons, so the rest of MI6 does not get to hear about them.

Parsons: M1, are you happy with my plan?

M1: Yes.

Parsons: I will also talk to Agent Emily to see if she has any intelligence on the subject of your work desires, M1.

Parsons: Are we happy with my plan?

Harriet: Yes.

M1: Yes.

Parsons: OK. I will co-ordinate with you when we need to get together again.

Thank you both. We can now return to the non-romantic part of our jobs.

Harriet and M1 laughed as they returned to their offices.

Back To School, MI6 Style

By about 3:30 pm Harriet had M1 back in school, MI6 style, in a conference room she used from time to time, when not all of MH6 needed to know what was going on. M1 was surprised to learn MI6 really did have a guide to having an office romance, when your prospective romantic partner is suspected of being a double agent.

Agent Harriet: You get to kill people, M1. I get to kill romance and try to keep you from being killed in the process..

MI1: I now know three (3) killer woman. I had not expected to add you to the list with Agent Parsons and Agent Emily.

Harriet: Let us hope your prospective girlfriend does not get herself added to your List of Killer Woman, M1. A lot of time, money and effort has gone into training you.

Harriet: The aim is for you not to have an actual romance with this woman, M1. If you do, dealing with both of you becomes so much more complicated.

M1 thought he might see some strange things in his vocation as an MI6 agent. Going back to school to learn how to have an office romance with a woman who may be a double agent may be the strangest so far.

Harriet: I hope you have been paying attention, M1. You are not getting a Profile Folder on office romances from me.

After about thirty (30) minutes of very unromantic discussion about undercover office romances, Harriet and M1 returned to her office.

Nicky Parsons and Emily Abernathy

Shortly after her discussion with M1 and Harriet, Nicky Parsons telephoned Emily Abernathy and set out the M1 -  Natasha situation.

Emily: Oh, Natasha. Yes, I have noticed her. Why don’t we send Natasha and M1 on a language course, external to the MI6 office. That is the sort of stuff which is routine for Harriet to organise and not suspicious. M1 and Natasha could go together and that would be their introduction.

Nicky: Excellent plan. Are you available to have a meeting in my office in 10 minutes?

Emily: Yes.

Nicky: Good. See you in 10. I will call M1 and Harriet and get them to join us.

Nicky then rang each of Harriet and M1: Meeting in my office in 10 minutes.

10 minutes later Nicky Parsons, Emily Abernathy, Agent Harriet and Agent M1 were gathered in the Parsons office for the meeting.

Parsons: Emily has an excellent plan and it involves more school for you M1. This time you are off to a language course, external to the MI6 office, and your girlfriend Natasha is going with you. Attending the course together will facilitate your introduction to each other. Harriet will coordinate the course attendance for each of you. It will be sold as a business as usual event for both Natasha and you.

Parsons: Is this plan workable for you, Harriet?

Harriet: Totally. M1 can properly report to me about the language course. Business as usual. I can also ensure he is being a good undercover boyfriend. I can also liaise with Natasha about the language course and its progress.

Parsons: Excellent. Can you please let me know when you have finalised the details of the language course? I will then get the four (4) of us together to go over the progress of the plan.

Parsons: Does anyone have any questions?

Emily, Harriet and M1: No.

Parsons: M1, Do you have any questions or thoughts?

M1: There sure is a lot of school involved in going on a date at MI6.

Emily: MI6 likes to take the fun out of everything.

Parsons: Thank you, everyone. It looks like this meeting is over.

It took Harriet just over an hour to finalise the details of the proposed language course for Natasha and M1. She then invited Natasha to her office to go over the relevant details as they would apply to her. Harriet told Natasha MI6 send agents on courses like this from time to time. This time it was her turn. There was no objection from Natasha.

Natasha also raised no objection when she was told M1 would be accompanying her to the language course.

Language Course

When language course day arrived, MI6 staff transported M1 and Natasha to the venue, an office on level 20 of 25 in a city office building. Conversation between M1 and Natasha during that commute was minimal and pleasant. The course itself was not controversial and the agents seemed to get some benefit from it.

As the course broke for the day, the script took an unexpected turn. M1 noticed Natasha had a companion who was not a language course attendee, nor was he her chauffeur. That role was performed by MI6. M1 decided to approach Natasha and Igor, the unfriendly boyfriend.

M1: Mr Igor, Natasha tells me that you have my new release Don Wilkerson jazz album Preach Brother!. I am very keen for that album to be returned to me. I think you should go home immediately and retrieve it. I do not have a sense of humour about people retaining my records, Mr Igor. Best you leave immediately.

Igor was not sure what to make of M1, but he left Natasha and the scene immediately.

M1: Agent Natasha, Igor seems a very unfriendly boyfriend and most certainly out of place here. Do you and I need to talk? You can tell me or you can tell MI6. I am easy either way.

Natasha was clearly unsettled by what unfolded after the language course broke for the day.

After several moments of silence, Natasha said to M1:

It is sufficient for the moment to say that someone in my family is being pressured by bad guys from Team Iron Curtain. I have been under stress from those Team Iron Curtain bad guys for some time. Nevertheless, I am not cooperating with them. Their presence here today was a surprise.

M1: It appears these Team Iron Curtain bad guys are following you. How they got the details of this location is concerning. It seems your home and office will need to be swept for bugs. Do not panic. I know someone at MI6 with whom you can chat about this. Come with me while I make a telephone call.

M1 found a public telephone booth nearby and rang Agent Harriet:

Agent Harriet, Cancel the chauffeur you planned to send us and recruit M2 for the job. There has been a bit of a situation and I think The Famous Five need to have a walk in the park.

Harriet: M1, A situation?

M1: Yes

Harriet: A walk in the park?

M1: Yes

Harriet: The Famous Five?

M1: Yes.

Harriet: All of them?

M1: Yes.

Harriet: M2 will be there in 15 minutes.

While they waited for M2 to arrive and play chauffeur for them, Natasha relaxed a little and there was some light conversation.

Natasha: Do you really have the new release Don Wilkerson jazz album Preach Brother!?

M1: Yes. Grant Green plays guitar on the album and Sonny Clark plays piano. And your unfriendly boyfriend, Igor, cannot borrow it.

M2 then arrived and took the three (3) of them the short trip to MI6 headquarters car park.

Harriet Gets Organised

Harriet then rang M2 and told him of his immediate job as a chauffeur.

Harriet then rang Nicky Parsons: Nicky can you get Emily and come to my office immediately. It seems a walk in the park is required.

Nicky: OK.

Within 5 minutes Nicky and Emily were in the office of Harriet. Harriet then told them of the telephone call from M1.

Nicky: We should meet M2 and his passengers in the MI6 car park and he can take us to a different park.

Harriet: I think I know a park that would be good for this kind of walking.

Emily: The car park awaits.

About 5 minutes later M2 arrived at the MI6 car park with M1 and Natasha.

Nicky, Emily and Harriet joined them in the now rather cosy vehicle and Harriet told M2 of their destination.

Once they arrived at Harriet Park, they were the only people using the park.

M1 then proceeded to tell the agents about the situation at the language course and his suggestion that the home and office of Natasha will need to be swept for bugs.

M1: Where are my manners? Natasha, Meet The Famous Five: Agent Nicky Parsons, Agent Emily Abernathy, Agent Harriet and Agent M2, and me.

Natasha, a little perplexed: Hello.

Parsons: We are meeting here to try to reduce the likelihood of the wrong ears hearing our conversation.

Natasha: The Famous Five?

Emily: For someone whose home and office needs to be swept for bugs and who had an unscheduled visit from an unfriendly boyfriend, you are a bit slow on the uptake.

Harriet: I will organise for your home and office to be swept for bugs. I will try to make it look routine.

You have day 2 of the language course to complete tomorrow.

Parsons: M2, I think you should also go tomorrow and provide outside the classroom surveillance of the scene.

M1: Is this coming together for you, Natasha?

Natasha: Yes, Thank you.

Emily: This walk in the park seems done. M2, Can you now return us to MI6 headquarters, please?

M2: Sure.

Language Course Day 2

When day 2 of the language course arrived, it was resplendent with the familiarity of day 1. MI6 staff transported M1 and Natasha to the venue, an office on level 20 of 25 in a city office building. Minimal and pleasant conversation between M1 and Natasha again populated that commute. Once again, the course itself presented no controversies and the agents seemed to view it beneficially.

In accordance with the request by Nicky Parsons, M2 was present outside the office where the course was being conducted. He also did surveillance on the ground surrounding the subject building.

Igor, the unfriendly boyfriend was also in the precincts of the building and he did not seem to have the new release Don Wilkerson jazz album Preach Brother! with him. However, he did seem to have two (2) friends with him and they did not look like jazz fans either.

When M2 noticed these three (3) not fans of jazz, he telephoned MI6 and suggested some more agents attend the scene.

Old habits die hard for Igor. As day 2 of the language course ended, he had another unfriendly boyfriend confrontation with Natasha on the walkway outside the level 20 office that hosted the course. Igor was clearly escalating his intensity with Natasha and M1 approached him. Igor was berating Natasha but also aware of the approaching M1.

As Igor drew his firearm and pointed it at Natasha, M1 launched himself at Igor. The firearm discharged and Natasha took the shot in her stomach. Her injury courtesy of Team Iron Curtain bad guy, Igor was serious but not fatal. The immediate result saw her fall to the ground in severe pain and quite a lot of bleeding.

After the discharge of the firearm, the impact of the body of M1 crashing into Igor was that he dropped his firearm. There then ensued a fierce physical confrontation between the two (2) men. During that confrontation, an opportunity presented itself and M1 did not hesitate. Cool as a cucumber, M1 tipped Igor over the rails of level 20 of the office building.

As Igor was speeding to the ground below, M1 addressed him:

"I told you to bring my new release Don Wilkerson jazz album Preach Brother! with you. You chose not to do so. That is a mistake you will never make again."

It would be the last time Igor would be a bad boyfriend or any kind of boyfriend.

Even though Natasha was on the ground, seriously wounded from the gunshot she took courtesy of Igor, she was coherent and had a close unobstructed view of M1 fatally neutralising the Igor threat. She gasped in horror as Igor sailed over the level 20 rails and fell to the ground below.

The sound of gun fire drew the attention of M2. He was now very close to M1. He noticed the other two (2) not fans of jazz approaching from behind Igor. M2 drew his firearm and took them both out.

M2: M1, are you OK?

M1: Yes.

M2: You stay here with Natasha. I will call this in.

M2 then proceeded to the ground floor and a public telephone booth.

He rang MI6: Send a clean up team to the language course site. Also medical transport is required for a gunshot wound.

Within 10 minutes an MI6 transport team was taking Natasha to a private MI6 medical facility.

M1 and M2 then made their way back to MI6 headquarters.

M1 had barely taken his seat upon returning to his office, when The Famous Five gathered there for an impromptu meeting.

Nicky Parsons: This calls for steak sandwiches, M1. Are you up for it?

Emily: At the M2 café.

Harriet: Come on, M1, steak sandwiches.

M1: Steak sandwiches.

After The Famous Five arrived at the M2 café and ordered their meals, conversation ensued. A great deal of it involved praise for M1 and his intuition. It solved a real problem, even though he did not initially see it.

Harriet: You told me you know two (2) killer women, M1. Are you now a killer boyfriend?

The table hosting the Famous Five erupted in laughter.