A New Regime, A New Normal

24 Hour Propaganda Television / Video Channel

A significant feature of the New Regime was its 24 hour Propaganda Television / Video Channel.  A harsh description of the channel is that it broadcasts official narratives and serves as a tool for public control and intimidation. Another description is that it operates to inform and educate citizens of the New Regime of how the transition from the old world to the new world was progressing and how the regime itself was operating in the new world.

The execution of the defiant Judge was broadcast as a prominent news item on the channel and was presented to the community as entirely justified for someone who was deliberately defiant of the requirements of the New Regime. The message was clear: citizens would do well to heed that stark warning against any act of regime defiance.

Not every action of the New Regime was broadcast on the channel and there were often items about the disciplining of otherwise unremarkable citizens, so that the community could see no one would escape the demands of the New Regime.

The channel would often extol the virtues of the Climate Integrity Lines, a mechanism through which citizens could report Infidels, and encourage the use of the Lines. Fools like The Princess of Language Hypocrisy may find themselves being the subject of a Climate Integrity Lines notification or report. Officers of the New Regime would then determine if the matter warranted investigation. None of that information about the workings of the Climate Integrity Lines was hidden from the public. It was broadcast on the Regime Television / Video Channel.

A message was repeated endlessly on the channel, whether you were a Judge or ordinary Johnny or Jodie, if you were defiant, the New Regime was coming for you. And there would be no mercy. The channel made clear the New Regime punished fanatics fanatically.

The channel also made clear a report or notification made to the Climate Integrity Lines could lead to someone being sent to the Re-Education Program.

The New Regime took the view its 24 Hour Television / Video Channel would tell the citizens what was going on, not cover it up, as news broadcasters would do in the former regime.

The channel also often had items explaining the Re-Education Program. How it is a bridge between the real world and the unrelenting hell of the 15 Minute Cities. Relevantly, originally the structure of the New Regime was put in place to deal with Climate Hoaxers. The New Regime now recognised its infrastructure, in particular the Re-Education Program, can also ensnare other types of Infidels, like The Princess of Language Hypocrisy.

The core messages of the Re-Education Program remain the same:

• The Infidels are the problem.

• The Infidels have a choice: Epiphany or Eternal Damnation in 15 Minute Cities.

• The whole idea of 15 Minute Cities in the New Regime is to show that they are a bad idea and should never be implemented.

• Every single piece of the 15 Minute Cities comes from the Infidels.

• Infidels should be given no respite from the hell their religious fervour and zealotry created, unless their epiphany is genuine and permanent.

• For those who do not achieve a genuine and permanent epiphany, their damnation is eternal, without relief.

The 15 Minute Cities Re-Education Program

The authorities in the New Regime decided to review the recent incarceration of Dresden Leipzig for breach of the recently implemented curfew. They decided Leipzig needed another course at the 15 Minute Cities Re-Education Program. Security Officers were promptly sent to the residence of Leipzig to arrest him and relocate him to the 15 Minute Cities Re-Education Program facility.

At his latest induction to the 15 Minute Cities Re-Education Programme, Dresden was introduced to Cindy Incidentally, who was sentenced to a course of the programme, because she once handed out pamphlets for a climate change advocacy group.

Whilst the week-long intensive program was a culture shock for Cindy Incidentally, it was not something against which she rebelled or raised an objection. During her time at the program, Cindy noted with interest the treatment of Dresden Leipzig. More than once during the program Dresden was specifically told by the lecturing authorities, successful completion of the program can lead to one being allowed to leave the 15 Minute Cities permanently.

Cindy also noted the feedback she received from the program lecturing authorities that she was progressing well through the program. A standout feature of the program for Cindy was how often the lecturing authorities made reference to Dresden Leipzig as an example of what happens to someone who transgresses against the New Regime.

At the completion of her program, Dresden Leipzig was beside Cindy Incidentally when the authorities told her that she had successfully completed the program. She would not progress to the 15 Minute Cities. She could return to the real world. As Cindy was packing up her belongings and preparing to leave, she heard the authorities tell Dresden that he would remain in the 15 Minute Cities. His status may be reviewed in the future, but for now he would remain in the 15 Minute Cities. It was obvious that was news Dresden was not comfortable hearing.

Cindy Incidentally then exited the 15 Minute Cities Re-Education Programme facility and made her way home.

A Bully Gets Some Re-Education

With the election of the New Regime, the campaign of sustained bullying to which D'Arbanville had been subjected by his manager Shonderosa, would come to an end. As soon as D'Arbanville was made aware of the Climate Integrity Lines, he prepared a complaint in respect of Shonderosa. He took a little time and when he considered his complaint to be complete, he utilised the Climate Integrity Lines to inform on Shonderosa.

D'Arbanville told the Climate Integrity Lines staff member, Shonderosa was a fanatical Climate Hoaxer. She was not content to contain her fanatical Climate Hoax advocacy to her private life, she shoved it down the throat of all and sundry at her work. He was even kind and considerate enough to provide the Climate Integrity Lines staff member with the home and work addresses of Shonderosa, as well as all of the telephone numbers he knew in respect of her. The Climate Integrity Lines staff member was very receptive of the complaint and information about Shonderosa. She said she thought it would receive prompt attention.

The following day at work was very entertaining for D'Arbanville. Shonderosa enjoyed the delight of a visit from the Stasi Sandmen to help her with her rehabilitation from climate hoax advocacy. It was off to the 15 Minute Cities Re-Education Program for Shonderosa and no argument or objection from her would be entertained.

Sign of Trouble

Felice was walking in her neighbourhood. She walked past the residence of single mother Eloise Shirehampton. The garage door was open. A sign in the garage was visible: Climate Action Now. Felice immediately proceeded to the nearest public telephone and called the Climate Integrity Lines to lay an information about Eloise Shirehampton and her sign. The very helpful Climate Integrity Lines staff member said the information would receive prompt attention. The call ended and Felice resumed her neighbourhood walk.

Within 10 minutes of the call from Felice, two Stasi Sandmen were at the residence of single mother Eloise Shirehampton. She was immediately taken into custody and transported to a 15 Minute Cities Re-Education Program facility, where she stayed until her court appearance.

Within three hours single mother Eloise Shirehampton was before a Judge and being sentenced for being an Infidel.

Judge: “Ms Eloise Shirehampton, Possession of a Climate Action Now sign makes you a Climate Hoaxing Infidel. There is no defence for your actions and no justification for them. You will be convicted of being an Infidel. You will be micro-chipped, forced to submit to a Digital ID, have to attend a 15 Minute Cities Re-Education Program and you will be relocated to a 15 Minute City. Your time in the real world is over.”

“I have ordered your former husband be present for these proceedings. I will now address him.

Mr Spectre Shirehampton, You are not in trouble. You will not need legal representation. Do you have any children?

Spectre Shirehampton: Yes, Three.

Judge: With whom do they reside?

Spectre Shirehampton: They reside with their mother, the accused before this Court. She has custody of them.

Judge: I order that Eloise Shirehampton have no contact with her children whatsoever. I order that custody of those children, the children of Spectre Shirehampton and Eloise Shirehampton, be solely with Spectre Shirehampton. Spectre Shirehampton you now have custody of the children. It is hard to imagine circumstances why you might want to attend a 15 Minute City and visit Eloise Shirehampton. The children are never to visit Eloise Shirehampton in her 15 Minute City. The children are to never have contact with her.

Do you understand the orders of this Court with respect to the custody of the children and contact with the mother, Eloise Shirehampton?

Spectre Shirehampton: Yes, Your Honour.

Judge: Sentence having been imposed upon Eloise Shirehampton and orders having been made regarding the residence and custody of the children and contact with their parents, this matter is now complete. Eloise Shirehampton can now be taken to a 15 Minute Cities Re-Education Program facility.

The 24 hour Propaganda Television / Video Channel picked up the story of Eloise Shirehampton, the single mother with the Climate Action Now sign in her possession and ran it as the top story for three days. The actual identities of the players were not revealed, but otherwise it was made public in all its glory. The good work of the solid, loyal citizen in contacting the Climate Integrity Lines was not missed. It was praised.

Settled Science

The Chief of The Stasi appeared on the 24 hour Propaganda Television / Video Channel to announce that:

“Our experts have settled the science, and it has confirmed what we have long suspected. A significant portion of the Climate Hoax Infidels suffer from an incurable mental illness that precludes them from hearing, seeing, understanding, identifying, recognising, accepting or respecting the truth. This mental illness is called Climatism and leads the Infidels to be potentially very dangerous and possibly extremely violent.

“Solid, loyal citizens, patriots, should not engage with these Infidels. Those citizens should utilise the Climate Integrity Lines and inform the authorities about the Infidels. Our trained Stasi Sandmen will attend upon the Infidels and then deal with them, as required.”

This story was run as the top story every hour on the 24 hour Propaganda Television / Video Channel for about a month. The New Regime also made appropriate official notifications to all facets of the medical profession about the now settled science.

Climatism In The Workplace

Excretia made a complaint of sexual harassment to Ms Human Resources Management about Stephenson, who denied the complaint. Ms Human Resources Management told Stephenson a formal inquiry would be set up by the accountancy firm. Stephenson told his colleague Mandrake about the false complaint and the inquiry. Both Stephenson and Mandrake were angry about the situation.

Mandrake left the company of Stephenson and promptly contacted the Climate Integrity Lines. Mandrake informed the Climate Integrity Lines staff that he was certain Excretia was suffering from Climatism and therefore posing a serious risk to the accountancy firm staff. Mandrake was told trained Stasi Sandmen would be at the accountancy firm as soon as possible to deal with Excretia.

Within 25 minutes two Stasi Sandmen were at the premises of the accountancy firm and had identified Excretia. They wasted no time in executing her in front of several staff members.

The Stasi Sandmen then proceeded to Ms Human Resources Management and had a conversation with her.

Stasi: Did it occur to you at all to enquire as to whether Excretia was suffering from Climatism when you took her complaint from her?

HRM: No.

Stasi: As soon as we saw her, we could tell she was suffering from Climatism. There is no way any complaint from her could possibly be valid.

In the circumstances you will now be required to undertake a 15 Minute Cities Re-Education Program and we will relocate you to a 15 Minute Cities Re-Education Program facility.

For the next week the 24 Hour Propaganda Television / Video Channel featured prominently the story of Excretia and how Climatism caused her to make a false complaint. The story also emphasised how the failure of Ms Human Resources Management to respond correctly to the Climatism of Excretia saw her having to undertake a 15 Minute Cities Re-Education Program. 

A Very Dirty Job

The Boss of MI5 Is Compromised

The Boss of MI6 walked into the office of Agent Parsons, who was otherwise alone at the time.

Boss: Agent Parsons, there has been rather a lot go on this morning, so I am a bit late for the walk in the park we organised. If it is convenient for you, we could go now.

Parsons: Our walk in the park, Sir.

Boss: Yes.

Parsons: Now.

Boss: Yes.

Parsons: Certainly, Sir. I will get my handbag and coat and be right with you.

There was no conversation between the two MI6 officers until they reached the park. Their only companions in the park were birds.

Boss: I have received some rather distressing news, Agent Parsons. My colleague at the head of MI5 has been compromised. The Russians have turned him. I wanted to make sure of my information before I shared it with you. I am certain the information is solid and correct.

Parsons: That is a lot to process, Sir.

Boss: Take a moment, Agent Parsons. I have more for you.

Parsons: Turned, Sir?

Boss: Correct, Agent Parsons, and time is not our friend.

Parsons: There is some urgency, Sir?

Boss: Yes, Agent Parsons. The urgency is that I want you to do what you do and take him out.

Parsons: No thoughts of incarceration for him, Sir?

Boss: Only in a coffin and then a cremation, Agent Parsons.

Parsons: Am I allowed to see your information or intelligence before I embark upon this mission?

Boss: I have a file in my office I am prepared to show you. It also has some locations where I believe you might find your target. Your team are going to have to trust me and trust you. You also might consider inviting Rhiannon to join your mission.

Parsons: So to put it bluntly, this is a hit.

Boss: Yes. It is a dirty job you do, Agent Parsons. And this is one of the dirtiest. I have a couple of photographs with me I will share with you.

Parsons (as she looks at the photographs): There is no part of this story that is good or pleasant news, Sir. Apart from the walk in the park.

Boss: I am glad you introduced me to the walk in the park, Agent Parsons.

Parsons: Unless you have more news with which to shock me, Sir, we can return to your office, so I can see your file.

Boss: No more shocking news, to my knowledge, Agent Parsons. So we can return to my office.

There was no further conversation between them until they were in the office of the Boss.

Boss: Here is the file, Agent Parsons. It will have to stay in my office.

Parsons: This is not particularly pleasant reading, Sir.

Boss: Do you have enough information, Agent Parsons?

Parsons: Information I never wanted to see or hear, Sir. I will assemble the Famous Five and also talk to Rhiannon. I will keep you informed as to our progress.

Boss: Thank you, Agent Parsons.

After leaving the office of the Boss, Nicky Parsons called into the office of each of Emily, Harriet, M1 and M2. Her message was simple: “We are going for a walk in the park”.

The agents complied promptly and silently.

Only the bird population of the park had changed since the earlier visit from Nicky Parsons.

Parsons: “I have some shocking news for you. We have been given a very dirty job to do. There is a traitor in the security service and our job is to take him out. The officer in question is the head of MI5. The Russians have turned him. The Boss showed me a file after he broke the news to me. The information seems authentic.

“I intend to do my job. I would like you to join me. You are not going to see the file. That is the rule the Boss imposed.”

M2: The Boss wants us to take out the head of MI5 because the Russians have turned him. And that is all the information we get?

Parsons: I have some information about where we might locate him, but otherwise, yes, you are correct.

M1: Quite the leap of faith.

Emily: You are satisfied as to the accuracy of the information?

Parsons: Yes.

M2: I will do my job, but I would not want to be you if the information turns out to not be accurate.

M1: I will also do my very dirty job, but this will not end well if the information turns out to be bad.

Harriet: Take out the head of MI5 and the only information we get is “Trust Me”. You do not ask much, Agent Parsons.

Parsons: I am also going to talk to Rhiannon about joining us for this mission.

Emily: Is there a time frame for this mission?

Parsons: As soon as possible.

Emily: I do not like traitors. I would prefer we were given more than “Trust Me”.

M1: While you are talking to Rhiannon, we might as well visit the work precinct of our target and try to assess what options present for us.

Parsons: I will give you the address I have been given.

Harriet: We can work on his home options when you have told us if Rhiannon will be joining us.

Nicky Parsons Meets with Rhiannon

A customer was walking out of the record shop as Nicky Parsons was walking in.

Parsons: Good morning, ladies. Mrs Record Shop Owner, Might I borrow Rhiannon for a walk and a short chat?

Mrs Record Shop Owner: Business to discuss?

Parsons: Yes. I will not be long and I will bring you back some muffins.

Mrs Record Shop Owner: Bribing me with muffins. Good job, Miss Parsons.

Rhiannon laughed as she walked out the door with Nicky.

Parsons: There is a park nearby. We can chat there.

Rhiannon: A park that is not crowded this time of day.

Once they arrived at the park, Nicky told Rhiannon the news.

Parsons: We have been given a very dirty job. You have been invited to join us. The Russians have turned the head of MI5. Our job is to take him out.

Rhiannon: A hit on the head of MI5? Is your information reliable?

Parsons: Yes and the information I have seen appears to be reliable.

Rhiannon: Is the whole team playing?

Parsons: You would make six.

Rhiannon: A very dirty and very dangerous job. I had better be paid well.

Parsons: I will give you his name and the locations I have as to where we might find him.

Rhiannon: I suspect our opportunity windows will be small.

Parsons: The rest of the team said they would go to his work precinct to see what opportunities might present themselves.

Rhiannon: I might take a look at his home neighbourhood and see if anything of note presents itself.

Parson: We will also have a look at the home options.

Rhiannon: OK. I think it is time to buy muffins and return to work.

Back at the record shop, Nicky spoke to Mrs Record Shop Owner: Thank you for letting me borrow Rhiannon. Here are your muffins. I will now be on my way.

A Working Breakfast

Later than evening Rhiannon telephoned M2: M2, I think an early start might be in order tomorrow. I propose we visit Five Grove, you never know who we might see there. I will pack my picnic basket for us and I will include some of the delights you like.

M2: A breakfast adventure at Five Grove?

Rhiannon: Yes.

M2: You will bring the picnic basket?

Rhiannon: Yes. I have a hunch we might see someone in their natural habitat. It is up to you whether you bring your camera. For my part, there will be no Russian Caravan tea.

M2: Your invitation is compelling, Rhiannon. When do you propose we leave?

Rhiannon: I will pick you up at 5:30 am at your home. Then we can go to Five Grove and look for the best vantage point.

M2: 5:30 am for an adventure at Five Grove. Confirmed, Rhiannon.

Rhiannon: Enjoy your evening, M2.

Adventure at Five Grove

The next morning Rhiannon arrived a little early at the residence of M2. She was keen for a friendly interlude before they undertook their adventure. M2 welcomed her initiative and her dedication.

Rhiannon: I chose not to wear lipstick today, M2.

M2: So you do not have to spend time reapplying your lipstick.

Rhiannon: Correct. And now it is time for our adventure. I packed the picnic basket catering for both long range and short range options.

M2: Very considerate of you, Rhiannon.

Rhiannon: When we arrive, I think it best that you choose your best vantage point first and then I will make my suggestion.

When she arrived at Five Grove, Rhiannon parked a little away from the residence of Mr MI5.

Rhiannon: Let us go for a short walk, M2. And you can decide if you prefer the long range picnic option or the short range picnic option.

M2: Interesting neighbourhood, Rhiannon. Picnic options are limited.

Rhiannon. So is time.

M2: My preference is short range, looking down the driveway. Perhaps from across the road.

Rhiannon: I will be short range, near the driveway, perhaps in an adjoining property.

M2: OK. Back to the vehicle to get our picnic supplies.

Once they retrieved their firearms and secured their positions, they waited for Mr MI5 to appear. His motor vehicle was parked in the driveway.

The moment arrived. Mr MI5 exited the front door of his residence and he seemed to linger for a moment on the small patio.

That was all that was needed for the agents. Rhiannon put her first two shots in the knees of Mr MI5. M2 focussed on his chest and head. Rhiannon put two more shots in his head before she returned to her motor vehicle. M2 spent his remaining bullets in the chest of Mr MI5 and then promptly returned to the motor vehicle.

Rhiannon drove a few miles from the scene before she stopped near a public telephone.

Rhiannon: Good Morning, Nicky Parsons. Your day starts early today. There has been an adventure at Five Grove. You might want to send a clean up crew.

Parsons: Are you alone?

Rhiannon: M2 should be in the office in a while.

Parsons: OK. Thank you for your information.

Rhiannon returned to her motor vehicle.

Rhiannon: Nicky Parsons knows about the adventure. I expect she will take care of it. I will take you to a train station and you can go to the office. I will take the picnic basket home and then go to the record shop.

M2: OK.

It did not take Nicky Parsons long to attend the scene with a clean up crew.

Parsons spoke to Mrs MI5 while the clean up crew did their work.

“Mrs MI5, we will take you with us so we can assess if it safe for you to return here. We will also have some support people look after you.

Do you mind if I use your telephone? I want to call my boss.

Mr MI5: You may use my telephone.

Parsons: Boss, there has been an incident at Five Grove. I have a team here looking after the situation. I am bringing Mrs MI5 in to the office with me. You might want to speak with her when we arrive.

The Boss: Thank you, Agent Parsons. I will see you both when you arrive.

The Office of The MI6 Boss

Boss: “Thanks to the good work of my agents, Mrs MI5, we have located and taken out the Russian assassin who executed your husband. For the time being we have somewhere safe for you to stay. We want to assess whether any ongoing threat to you exists. Of course, that will involve a complete sweep of your residence. When we have decided that it is safe for you to return to your residence, we will let you know.

“Agent Parsons will organise some of our support people to look after you, following the shock loss of your husband. When they have finished their initial work with you here, they will transfer you to a house where you will be safe.

“Mrs MI5, my secretary has just buzzed me to tell me those support people are waiting outside my office for you.

“Thank you for your organising work, Agent Parsons.

“I will now let you go with the support people, Mrs MI5.”

Mrs MI5: Thank you.

Boss: Now that Mrs MI5 has left, Agent Parsons, is there any information you have for me?

Parsons: It looks like M2 and Rhiannon took care of business, but I will have to confirm those details for you, Sir.

Boss: And you took care of the clean up.

Parsons: Yes.

Boss: Good work bringing Mrs MI5 in here, Agent Parsons. I have not decided what I want to do with her.

Parsons: I see you have your explanation of the events prepared, Sir.

Boss: “Yes, Agent Parsons. Very helpful of that Russian assassin to have himself executed by our agents after he fled the scene.

“Agent Parsons, this has been excellent work by you and your team.

“I had better start informing people of the news. Thank you again, Agent Parsons.”

Parsons: Thank you, Sir.

The Famous Five Team Meeting

Nicky Parsons returned to her office and called a team meeting of The Famous Five.

“We will meet outside the building in ten (10) minutes. Bring your coats and handbags.”

Once the team had assembled outside the building, Nicky said: “We are off to the park.”

They proceeded to the park and then Nicky said: “Business has been taken care off. I understand M2 has some news to share.”

M2: Rhiannon suggested we go to Five Grove for a breakfast picnic this morning. Mr MI5 briefly paused on his patio, seemingly on his way to his motor vehicle. He did not complete that short walk to his motor vehicle, thanks to a volley of bullets that introduced themselves to him. Once we saw the Five Grove business was complete, we left. After driving for a few miles, Rhiannon stopped to telephone Nicky to get her to take care of the clean up. Then we went on to our work.

M1: That was swift work.

M2: Time was short. The job was dangerous. A moment presented itself. We took it and then we left.

Emily: Swift work, indeed. And all on the “Trust Me” of Nicky.

Harriet: I will keep my eye out for intelligence on Mr MI5 that is more than just “Trust Me”.

M1: This is our job. It is a dirty job. For Queen and Country.

Nicky: I am in no hurry to go back to work. I propose lunch at the M1 café, my treat.

Emily: Food, to help the medicine go down.

Harriet: And tea.

M2: I am in no hurry to return to work.

M1: Food, to help the medicine go down.

Nicky: Lead the way, M1. 

Royal Sanction

The Stuffy Shirts Review The Bratwurst Café Adventure

Agent Harriet Windsor telephoned Agent Nicky Parsons: Nicky, Can you and Emily come and see me? There is something I think we should discuss.

Nicky Parsons: No problem. We will be there shortly.

Once the Stuffy Shirts had gathered in her office, Harriet shared her thoughts:

“Our recent adventure with Rhiannon got me thinking. Specifically about your adventure at the Bratwurst Café close to Emily’s place. Where Emily took her fabric softener bottle and poured some of its contents into a pot of tea. She then poured a cup of tea each for the Iron Curtain couple, Svetlana and Igor. The fabric softener became a disabling tool for Svetlana and Igor.

“The Bratwurst Café is where I want us to focus. If the Iron Curtain assassins, Svetlana and Igor, frequented that Café, perhaps they are not the only ones. Maybe we should give the Bratwurst Café a closer look and see if it hosts the wrong kind of customers.”

Emily: Rhiannon is very strong on keeping trouble out of her neighbourhood. I am not fond of trouble frequenting my neighbourhood. I am happy to take a closer look at the Bratwurst Café.

Nicky: Are you suggesting the MI6 finance people have a look at their set up?

Harriet: Yes. And I think we should visit them and see if they are focussed on the correct clientele.

Emily: Tea and muffins, for work purposes?

Nicky: Well done, Emily.

Harriet: Tea and Muffins Round 1 will give us a chance to see what is going on, while the finance people do what they do. Then we can organise Tea and Muffins Round 2, armed with the information of the finance people.

Emily: Agent Parsons, I can see there is a benefit to be had by undertaking Tea and Muffins Round 1 at the Bratwurst Café promptly.

Nicky: Your argument is compelling, Agent Abernathy. Perhaps we could adjourn to the Bratwurst Café for lunch.

Harriet: I embrace your leadership, Agent Parsons. I will make a call to the finance people and then I will be ready to undertake this mission.

Emily: Let us convene in the office of Agent Parsons in 15 minutes and then we can leave for the mission.

Nicky: The Stuffy Shirts are agreed.

The Bratwurst Café

Patronage of the Bratwurst Café was initially sparse and The Stuffy Shirts had no trouble finding a suitable table. They chose a central location, giving them optimum vision of the café happenings. The dining population increased during the lunch period, which was the focus of the visit by The Stuffy Shirts.

Overwhelmingly unremarkable and uncontroversial accurately described the Bratwurst Café The Stuffy Shirts visited. Everything they witnessed and experienced suggested the attendance at the café of the Iron Curtain assassins, Svetlana and Igor, was constrained to a choice by the couple and not part of an Iron Curtain project.

Emily: The good news is so far this Café is not an operational venue for the communist threat.

Harriet: The finance people will soon tell us if that threat is latent rather than obvious.

Nicky: Then we will have to return here to see if our initial assessment was correct.

Emily: Tea and Muffins for Queen and Country, ladies.

Harriet: We need to be well nourished to do our work, Agent Abernathy.

Nicky: Our research must be thorough. Infiltration of the neighbourhood is completely unacceptable.

Emily: Another hour of research here and then we shall return to the office.

Harriet: Correct Agent, Abernathy. It would be foolish to rush.

Nicky: I will get us another pot of tea.

Finance Review of Bratwurst Café

Just under a week later Harriet received the MI6 finance review of the Bratwurst Café. It was clean of any evidence of an Iron Curtain connection.

Harriet telephoned Nicky Parsons: The finance report says the Bratwurst Café is free of communist infiltration.

Nicky Parsons: That is good news. I propose visit two to the Bratwurst Café occur today to ensure our original surveillance and reconnaissance assessment was correct.

Harriet: It will need to be a substantial secondary assessment, Agent Parsons.

Nicky: Nothing less will suffice, Agent Windsor.

Harriet: Will you inform Agent Abernathy?

Nicky: Yes and we can all leave from my office in 30 minutes.

Harriet: Splendid.

During their second work visit to the Bratwurst Café, the Stuffy Shirts made more trips to the café service counter and wandered round the café more than they did on the first visit. The result was the same; nothing suggested the café was part of an Iron Curtain project.

Nicky: I think we should go and visit Rhiannon in her record shop. It was because of her that we discovered this good news.

Harriet: Showing appreciation to Rhiannon for this is a good idea.

Emily: Tea and muffins for work, then visit Rhiannon and thank her. Excellent idea.

Once The Stuffy Shirts were at the Rhiannon record shop, they waited until the customers left the store before they approached Rhiannon at the service counter with her employer. After introductions, Nicky spoke to Rhiannon and her boss remained present:

“Inspired by your unfortunate involvement with the Iron Curtain communists in Flowers From The Market, which we were happy to clean up with you, we decided to take a look at a café in the neighbourhood where Emily lives. An incident occurred their earlier and we wanted to ensure it was not similarly infiltrated like Flowers From The Market. It was clean and it was our dealing with you that led to our discovery of that good news.

We like your idea of keeping the neighbourhood clean of troublemakers.

“You gave Rhiannon a chance at a new life, Mrs Record Store Owner, and my life is better because you did. If there is ever any trouble in your neighbourhood, Mrs Record Store Owner, do not hesitate to call.

“Thank you both. We had better get back to the office.

Harriet walked over to Rhiannon and kissed her on her cheek: “I am glad you did not shoot me and I am glad your Prince came.”

Harriet then walked over to Mrs Record Store Owner and kissed her on her cheek: “Thank you.”

Emily: “Fabric softener as a disabling tool. That story worked for you when we first met, Rhiannon, and it helped give me piece of mind in my neighbourhood. Flowers and fabric softener inspired us to look for communists. Thank you. Your contribution to our work is appreciated.

“Thank you, Mrs Record Store Owner. I appreciate the part you play in all of this.

Nicky: Thank you, ladies. We have to return to work.

The Stuffy Shirts Get a Royal Welcome

Agent Harriet Windsor was alone in her office doing nothing in particular when she received a telephone call:

Adult Female: Is that Harriet Windsor?

Harriet: Yes.

Adult Female: Hold the line please. I have a call for you.

The Queen: Harriet?

Harriet: Yes.

The Queen: It is Elizabeth, your cousin.

Harriet: Elizabeth. The Queen?

The Queen: Do not worry about formalities, Harriet. I want you to come and see me. And I want you to bring your two work friends with you, Nicky Parsons and Emily Abernathy. I will explain it all when you get here. I could send a car for you, but that might draw attention to you. So you can make your own way to the Palace. You know the way. You have been here before.

Harriet: I will be there as soon as I can.

The Queen: Thank you, Harriet. Good-bye.

Harriet immediately telephoned Nicky Parsons: Nicky, Come and see me immediately. Do not delay.

Nicky: OK. I will be there shortly.

Harriet immediately telephoned Emily Abernathy: Emily, Come and see me immediately. Do not delay.

Emily: I am on my way.

Within 5 minutes the Stuffy Shirts were assembled in the office of Harriet.

Harriet: My cousin just rang me. The cousin that is The Queen. She wants the three of us to attend upon her, basically immediately.

Nicky Parsons: The Queen?

Harriet: Do you have any pressing work on?

Nicky: No.

Emily: What is this about?

Harriet: We will find out when we get to Buckingham Palace.

I am a little partial to my cousin. So I intend to answer her request.

Emily: I will be back here in less than 10 minutes with my coat and handbag.

Nicky: My coat and handbag are also coming with me to see The Queen. 10 Minutes.

Harriet: Now that we are ready to leave, I think a taxi is the best transport option. It will attract less attention than a work motor vehicle.

Once the Stuffy Shirts were in the taxi and on their way, Nicky spoke: You are definitely in charge today, Harriet. I may have a butterfly or two in my stomach.

Emily: When you said you would give us a tour, I am sure this was not how I expected it to occur.

Harriet: This is a surprise for me, also.

Once the Stuffy Shirts arrived at Buckingham Palace, Harriet led them to the reception area and dealt with the reception staff.

The Stuffy Shirts waited in silence.

After about ten minutes, The Queen appeared, alone. She walked over to Harriet.

The Queen: Hello, Harriet.

Harriet: Hello, Your Majesty.

Harriet then introduced a rather nervous Nicky Parsons and Emily Abernathy.

The Queen: Thank you for coming, ladies. I think we should go for a walk in the garden.

The Stuffy Shirts followed The Queen to the large garden in front of the palace.

Once the four women were in the garden alone, The Queen spoke.

“I know who the three of you are. That is why you are here. This is business, hopefully disguised as pleasure.

“I have plenty of staff and plenty of security. You three women are outside my security and can do things they cannot. I have been given information, you call it intelligence, that the catering firm hired for a function here next Thursday has been infiltrated by the kind of communists that keep you gainfully occupied. Rather unfriendly bunch. Apparently they plan to kill me. I tend not to have a sense of humour about those things, much like you three ladies. So I thought I would have a chat to you about them. There is no need for you to keep any of them alive, if the intelligence turns out to be true.

If you think your friend who has a rather interesting habit of kneecapping people would assist you in this endeavour, she is welcome to join you.

“I did not invite you ladies here for fun. If these people really are a problem, then take them out, for Queen and Country. Just like you do for others like them.

The circumstances of this conversation should inform you that it is to go not further than us. Do your research. Do your job and one day we may have another chat.

Are there any questions?”

Nicky Parsons: Your Majesty, You want us to be us?

The Queen: Every bit of it, Agent Parsons. I want you to do your absolute worst on these people. No mercy. Something with which I understand you are familiar.

Emily: Your Majesty, I am a little shocked by all of this. We are to be us, effectively with no restrictions, and Rhiannon can join us?

The Queen: Yes, Agent Abernathy. Be your effective selves.

Emily: When I woke up this morning, this was not what I was expecting of my day. I am in. And my very worst is the least they deserve.

Nicky: I am in. I am in and I will talk to Rhiannon. Her skills definitely will not hurt here.

Harriet: You are the Queen and my cousin. I tend not to have a sense of humour when the threat is personal. I am in and formalities will be no impediment to getting the job done.

The Queen: Thank you, ladies. I think it is time for us to adjourn to the Palace for tea and muffins.

Harriet: Tea and muffins?

The Queen: I am The Queen, Harriet. I get to know things.

Nicky and Emily laughed.

The Queen: I see the ice has broken. Now, back to the Palace for tea and muffins.

Preparation Begins

In the taxi on the way back to MI6 Harriet spoke to Nicky and Emily: I will return to the office and get the finance people to look at the caterers. You two can go to see Rhiannon and invite her to join us.

Nicky: Your plan works for me.

Emily: We will come and see you when we get back.

Nicky and Emily browsed the records in the store for several minutes until Rhiannon had dealt with her customers. Then they approached Rhiannon with the news.

Nicky: We are here to recruit you for our latest mission. Apparently intelligence suggests some communists are planning to kill The Queen. Our job is to take them out. You have been invited to join us. Are you interested?

Emily: It is a no restrictions mission.

Rhiannon: Who gave you this mission?

Nicky: A lady called Elizabeth.

Rhiannon: The Queen?

Emily: Yes, and she said you were welcome to join us.

Nicky: Come and be a Stuffy Shirt with us.

Emily: No restrictions.

Nicky: Communists posing as caterers.

Rhiannon: I will take pleasure in spoiling their party.

Nicky: Only five people know about this mission. That is the way it must stay. We will now return to the office and plan the mission. We will let you know when we have more details.

Rhiannon: Tell me the name of these caterers. My network may have some intelligence on them.

Emily: Dynamic Caterers.

Rhiannon then telephoned Mr Loan Shark: Mr Loan Shark, I would like you to give me all the intelligence you have on Dynamic Caterers. There is no need to tell anyone about this. Only you and I need to know about it. I will talk to you again tomorrow to see how you are progressing.

Mr Loan Shark: No trouble, Miss Rhiannon.

Rhiannon: Thank you, Mr Loan Shark. Enjoy your day.

Nicky: We will return to the office. We will be in touch with you.

Rhiannon: Thank you, ladies.

Preparation Continues

Upon her return to MI6, Harriet went to see her colleague in charge of the finance section.

Harriet: I have been given some intelligence, which if correct, is concerning. We cannot afford mistakes on this exercise and I would like you to keep the reason for this research to yourself, but to do the research thoroughly.

Dynamic Caterers has come onto our radar. We need the complete package on them. It is as important to rule people out as it is to rule people in.

Mr Finance: I understand. I will look into Dynamic Caterers for you and I will let you know when my research is complete.

Harriet: Thank you.

Nicky and Emily went to see Harriet when they returned to MI6.

Nicky: Rhiannon needed no persuading. She is happy to be part of the mission. She even had her network look into Dynamic Caterers.

Harriet: The head of our finance section is looking into Dynamic Caterers for me.

Emily: If those caterers turn out to be communists, there is no good reason for their continued existence.

Nicky: I am pretty sure that is why we have this mission.

Harriet: The inclusion of Rhiannon removes any doubt on that issue.

Clarification of The Caterers

The next day Mr Loan Shark went to visit Rhiannon at the record shop a little before lunch time. He waited until the customers left the store.

Mr Loan Shark: It is strange to have 6 Russians in an English catering service. I put all the details of my information in this envelope for you.

Rhiannon: Thank you, Mr Loan Shark. I suspect those Russian caterers might be the recipient of a visit from my friends. I may even help them.

Mr Loan Shark: To check on their health, of course.

Rhiannon: A city showing concern for its inhabitants, Mr Loan Shark.

Mr Loan Shark: I am happy to play my part, Miss Rhiannon.

Rhiannon: I am grateful to you, Mr Loan Shark. Enjoy your day.

Once Mr Loan Shark left the record store, Rhiannon telephoned Nicky Parsons.

Rhiannon: Quite a coincidence that 6 Russians would be in a catering service engaged for a function at Buckingham Palace. 6 Russians and no one else.

Nicky: A remarkable coincidence.

Rhiannon: It is rather amusing that the network connection I contacted is assisting your establishment, without any hesitation.

Nicky: This is a mission unlike all others. I will let you know when I have more information for you.

Nicky then telephoned Harriet: Rhiannon just called me. Dynamic Caterers have quite a recruitment program. 6 Russians in a British catering service engaged for a function at Buckingham Palace. No other staff.

Harriet: Cavalier about the part of not drawing attention to themselves.

I will pass your information on to Mr Finance.

Harriet then telephoned Mr Finance, who told her he was on his way to see her.

When he arrived in her office, Mr Finance confirmed the information. Dynamic Caterers consisted of 6 Russians and no one else. On the surface it looked like a simple catering company. Their recruitment practise suggested catering was not their real business.

Harriet: Ordinarily, Mr Finance, I would be happy to share with you the reason for the enquiry and the mission to which it is connected. On this occasion, I think plausible deniabilty is a better path for you to tread.

Mr Finance: Is that the time? You will have to excuse me, Agent Harriet. There is something that requires my prompt attention.

Harriet: I will delay you no further, Mr Finance. Thank you for your assistance.

The Stuffy Shirts soon assembled in the office of Harriet.

Harriet: 6 staff all Russian, no one even remotely British on staff. Dynamic Caterers need shutting down, permanently.

Emily: I have a surveillance idea. We take some flowers from the new Rhiannon business and purport to supply them to the caterers, so we can get an up close and personal idea of how they operate.

Nicky: I like it. It gets us on the premises and it may even give us an opportunity to take them out.

Emily: My plan is flowers as stage 1 and raid as stage 2, but there may be a need to get lethal on stage 1.

Harriet: I like the idea of taking Rhiannon to any visit to the premises.

Nicky: We need to talk to Rhiannon. So we need to visit her. This may involve tea and muffins.

Emily: Sacrifices have to be made in this job.

Harriet: Back here in 10 minutes with your coats and handbags.

The Rhiannon Record Shop

Several customers were occupying Rhiannon and her employer when the Stuffy Shirts walked in the store. They spent their time browsing until the customers left the store.

Nicky: We have a plan, Rhiannon, and we need your input.

Mrs Record Store Owner: Do I need to leave the room?

Nicky: No. We can be circumspect with our discussion.

Emily: Stage 1 We take some flowers from your new business and purport to supply them to the troublemakers as part of their set up, so we can get an up close and personal idea of how they operate. Stage 2 A raid, where we would conduct business. There may be a need to conduct business on Stage 1.

Harriet: We would pay you for your flowers.

Rhiannon: 4 hustling 6. Those are doable odds.

When do you propose this happen?

Nicky: If you can be at our office at 10:00 am tomorrow, with the flowers. It will unfold from there.

Rhiannon: 10:00 am tomorrow with a bunch of flowers. No problem.

Nicky: Will that be a problem, Mrs Record Store Owner?

Mrs Record Store Owner: No. You ladies do your business.

Emily: Can we thank you with tea and muffins?

Mrs Record Store Owner: Only for 15 minutes, then I have to come back here to run the store. You can take Rhiannon with you.

The Stuffy Shirts Plus One Do Business

Rhiannon and the flowers arrived at MI6 on time. She had a variation to the plan.

Rhiannon: “You Stuffy Shirts enter through the front door. I will take care of the back entrance. Start off calm when you do your flowers sale routine, then get chaotic. The Russians being greeted by excitable women selling flowers should destabilise them and add in the language problems for good measure.

“Stay alert. You may have to conduct business immediately.”

Harriet: Unsettle them with a chaotic sales pitch?

Rhiannon: Yes. And it may not hurt to mention the language a few times.

Emily: The plan works for me.

Nicky: I like it.

When the agents arrived at the premises of Dynamic Caterers, Rhiannon made her way to the rear. Two males were loading material into a van marked Dynamic Caterers. Rhiannon did not hesitate, she immediately took them both out. A couple of shots to the legs and then several shots to the chest and head. Quick, clean and decisive.

After reloading her firearm, Rhiannon entered the rear of the premises.

Happy Emily greeted the Russian caterers with the flowers in her hand.

There were three men in the store and Emily spoke to all of them, individually and together. From the outset they could not work out what was going on.

Harriet joined in the conversation and elevated her voice. She adopted the same tactics: talk to all of them, talk to one or two of them.

Nicky was watching and listening. The Rhiannon plan was working. When she joined the conversation her voice was elevated further. The confusion saw another male join them trying to work out what was going on.

Rhiannon was now in the premises with them and she got straight down to business. A knee shot and a head shot took care of the last Russian to join the confusion.

Emily emptied her firearm into the chest of the Russian standing in front of her.

Nicky put three shots into the forehead of the Russian in front of her.

Four women and one Russian was all that remained.

The Russian was surrounded and Emily had reloaded.

Harriet was surprisingly calm. She grabbed the remaining Russian by his hair and told him to get down on his knees.

She put her firearm to his forehead and said: “You wanted to kill The Queen. You wanted to kill my cousin.

You should have stayed in Russia and left us alone.”

Harriet then emptied her firearm into his forehead.

Rhiannon calmly walked over to Harriet and put her arms around her.

Rhiannon said: “It’s over” and walked Harriet to a chair to sit down.

Rhiannon: “Nicky, you might want to call this in to MI6, so a clean up crew can do their work. No rush. Excellent work, ladies.”

Emily: I will call it in.

Nicky: This is not tea and muffins. This is steak sandwiches.

Rhiannon: There is one more task I need to undertake.

Rhiannon: Hello, Buckingham Palace. This is a message for Her Majesty The Queen from her cousin Lady Harriet Windsor. She will have to get new caterers for her function on Thursday. Dynamic Caterers are no longer in business. Thank you.

Royal Messenger: Your Majesty, about an hour ago we received a rather strange message from your cousin, Lady Harriet Windsor. You will have to get new caterers for your function on Thursday. Dynamic Caterers are no longer in business.

The Queen: Thank you, Lady Harriet. Thank you. 

Flowers

Casual Introductions

Rhiannon telephoned Mrs Maxine Hubbard: Mrs Hubbard, I would like you to come to the café across the road from the record shop and bring Miss Penelope Styles with you. There is someone I would like you to meet.

Mrs Hubbard: We will be there in 20 minutes.

When Mrs Hubbard and Penelope Styles arrived, they joined Rhiannon in a booth at the back of the café. Rhiannon then went to the café counter and spoke to Mrs Café Manager: Come and join us for a pot of tea. I have some news for you.

Mrs Café Manager promptly joined Mrs Hubbard and Penelope Styles at the Rhiannon booth.

Rhiannon spoke to her companions: This is nothing more than a friendly meeting of people who have businesses in the neighbourhood. With the assistance of Penelope Styles, Mrs Hubbard will be running Floraville, my new business venture, a florist. Mrs Café Manager runs this lovely café.

If ever you or your café need flowers, Mrs Café Manager, you might consider seeing if Mrs Hubbard and Penelope Styles can assist. Similarly, you ladies might consider eating and drinking at this café. Local businesses helping each other is in all of our interests.

It also would not hurt the business of the record store that employs me, if prospective customers were sent my way.

Mrs Café Manager: Flowers, Rhiannon?

Rhiannon: Flowers, Mrs Café Manager. Records and flowers. And I thought drinking tea at your café was the best way to introduce you to each other.

Mrs Café Manager: Would you ladies care for a muffin to celebrate this news?

Mrs Hubbard: Tea and muffins, Rhiannon. An interesting and pleasant way to celebrate your new venture.

Penelope Styles: Tea and muffins are good for me.

Rhiannon: Tea and muffins, Mrs Café Manager. With pleasure.

Mrs Café Manager: Tea and muffins it is then.

In less than 5 minutes Mrs Café Manager was back with muffins and a fresh pot of tea.

The ladies chatted and got to know each other a little better for the next half hour and then they returned to their respective workplaces.

Complications with The Flower Wholesaler

A few days later Lady Harriet Windsor called in to the office of Nicky Parsons and they had a conversation.

Lady Harriet: I have just read some interesting intelligence. A wholesale company that supplies flowers to retail florists, at least in part, seems to be funding Iron Curtain operatives.

Parsons: Flowers. That is a bit creative. Do we need to take a closer look at this wholesale flower supplier?

Lady Harriet: I think that would be a good idea.

The meeting was interrupted by a telephone call from Rhiannon to Nicky Parsons: The café across the road from the record shop would be a good place for us to get together while I share some news with you. Is this evening after work convenient?

Parsons: A catch up to share news, OK. Should I bring Harriet and Emily with me?

Rhiannon: That is an excellent idea. Thank you.

Parsons: We will be there just before 6:00 pm.

Nicky then telephoned Emily: Are you free to come to my office for a short chat?

Emily: I will be there in 5 minutes.

Upon her arrival Nicky said: Rhiannon has invited us for a catch up at the café across the road from her record shop. I said we will be there just before 6:00 pm. Are you going to join us?

Emily: The Stuffy Shirts and Rhiannon catching up sounds good to me.

Parsons: Harriet also has some interesting intelligence. A wholesale flower supplier is funding our Iron Curtain trouble makers.

Emily: A flower wholesaler. That is a bit sneaky.

Parsons: Perhaps we should pay them a not so sneaky visit.

Harriet: It is not a long time before we have to leave to meet Rhiannon. We could pack up a little early today and go to see Rhiannon.

Emily: Rhiannon sounds better than flowers for the Iron Curtain.

Parsons: It looks like we are packing up for the day. See you back here shortly.

The Café Catch-Up

The Stuffy Shirts found themselves a booth at the Rhiannon café and Rhiannon soon joined them.

Rhiannon: Ladies, I have some news. I now have a florist business, Floraville, a retail florist run by Mrs Maxine Hubbard, an experienced florist, and Miss Penelope Styles, a reformed Tea Drinker.

Nicky Parsons: Flowers.

Rhiannon: Flowers. It is a good business direction and it has utility for my network.

Emily: Congratulations.

Harriet: I should also say congratulations. Tell me your wholesaler is not Flowers From The Market.

Rhiannon: My wholesaler is Flowers From The Market.

Harriet: Happenstance is never far away from us. We think your flowers may have an Iron Curtain problem.

Parsons: Intelligence seems to suggest that Flowers From The Market is funding Iron Curtain operatives.

Rhiannon: I have no sense of humour when it comes to people challenging my new way of life.

Emily: It looks like we are back together to shut down this flower wholesaler.

Parsons: The good news for you, Rhiannon, is that MI6 will pay you for your efforts.

Harriet: My plan is to have MI6 shut down and then sell the wholesale flower business to someone they can scrutinise. Rhiannon can keep her retail florist business and MI6 will keep an eye on the wholesaler.

Parsons: I like your plan.

Emily: I can definitely work with that plan.

Harriet: When we get to work tomorrow we can work out an overview of disrupting the Iron Curtain funding wholesaler. Let us enjoy the rest of the evening with Rhiannon.

Rhiannon: I like your plan and I am keen to assist.

Emily: Work tomorrow, enjoy tonight. I like it.

Parsons: It is good to see you, Rhiannon, and welcome back. Let us enjoy the evening.

Rhiannon Visits Floraville

Floraville enjoyed the pleasure of an early visit from Rhiannon the next day, although pleasure was hardly the motivation for the visit.

Rhiannon: Ladies, My friends at MI6 tell me we have a problem and I am a long way from happy about it. The problem is not you Mrs Hubbard. The problem is the communists who seem to have infiltrated your flower supplier and have done it to fund operatives that threaten us. It is an understatement to say that I do not take kindly to anyone who threatens my new life.

Mrs Hubbard, I would be very grateful if you could put together all you may have on Flowers From The Market, your flowers wholesaler. I am happy to help you where I can. I will then provide that material to MI6 and then a plan will be hatched to rid us of the problem they have brought to our door.

Mrs Hubbard: I can give you the contact details of the wholesaler and the times they usually make deliveries here. It will not take me long to find that information.

Rhiannon: That would be excellent, Mrs Hubbard. I will then leave with your information and allow you to return to your day. I am sure MI6 will be grateful for the assistance.

Mrs Hubbard: I will put the information in an envelope for you, Rhiannon. No one else needs to see it. And then you can give it to your friends.

Rhiannon: There is a smooch on your cheek from me, Mrs Hubbard.

Through their chuckles, Mrs Hubbard and Penelope Styles wished Rhiannon a good day.

Tea, Muffins and Intelligence

Rhiannon promptly telephoned Nicky Parsons: Tea, Muffins and Intelligence, Agent Parsons. My neighbourhood café awaits your attendance.

Parsons: The Stuffy Shirts will be there in 30 minutes.

Over tea and muffins, Rhiannon gave the envelope to Nicky Parsons and discussion ensued about how to deal with the problem wholesaler.

Harriet: I will get the MI6 finance people to look closely at Flowers From The Market.

Emily: This is tricky. MI6 have to raid and shut down the communists, then sell the wholesale flower business to someone they can scrutinise. All while not disrupting the businesses of the retail florists.

Harriet: MI6 will have to find someone to run the wholesale flowers supplier until the sale is completed.

Parsons: I will talk to the Boss when we get back to the office.

The Stuffy Shirts Meet with The Boss

As soon as The Stuffy Shirts arrived at the secretary to The Boss, she greeted them with: Ladies, I will let him know you want to see him.

Laughter ensued from The Stuffy Shirts.

The Boss appeared: Agents, My office awaits you.

Nicky Parsons: “Harriet has some interesting intelligence that a wholesale flowers supply company seems to be funding Iron Curtain operatives.

Rhiannon the ordinary record shop girl now has a retail florist business and its flowers are supplied by that same flower wholesaler.

Rhiannon has also given us good information about the business that supplies her florist with flowers.

“MI6 have to raid and shut down the communists, then sell the wholesale flower business to someone they can scrutinise. All while not disrupting the businesses of the retail florists. MI6 will have to find someone to run the wholesale flowers supplier until the sale is completed.”

The Boss: I know someone who can run it.

Emily: That is why you are the Boss.

The Boss: (Through laughter) From one enigma to another.

Rhiannon is never far away from you, is she?

Harriet: Rhiannon was an unexpected development on both counts. Her business venture and her relationship with us help us here.

The Boss: Did I hear you say that Rhiannon would accompany you on the raid of the flowers wholesaler? It sounds like her kind of work.

Nicky Parsons: I like the relationship we have with you, Sir.

The Boss: I will give Harriet the details of the chap who will run the wholesale flowers business after I have had a chat with him.

Thank you for the visit, agents, and enjoy your day.

The Stuffy Shirts Have a Meeting

The Stuffy Shirts adjourned to the office of Nicky Parsons.

After they each took their seats, Emily spoke: I am sure all spy agencies are run like this one.

Nicky: I can definitely see other spy agencies not only having a boss who encourages creativity, but who actively contributes to that creativity.

Harriet: Perhaps it is my royal blood, I will content myself with this spy agency. I have no need to test the waters elsewhere.

Emily: I have no wish to break up The Stuffy Shirts, Your Ladyship.

Nicky: I have travelled through time. I am not going to another spy agency.

Harriet: Then we shall do our best to enjoy our enigmatic lives in this spy agency.

Nicky: Speaking entirely for myself, I am rather annoyed that Rhiannon has had her new life imposed upon by the communists. This job lets me do something about that and I intend to do so.

Harriet: If I had an ambiguity about shutting down that wholesale flowers operation before, I certainly have none now.

Emily: I have absolutely no problem at all in Rhiannon being Rhiannon to those communists and I am happy to help her.

Harriet: It would be a dreadful shame if those communists were to suffer injuries in the raid.

Nicky: It is a dirty job. Accidents happen. I will make sure Rhiannon is with us.

Nicky telephoned Rhiannon: Rhiannon, our raid on Flowers From The Market will be ready to go on Thursday. Are you interested in joining us? I am sure we could use your assistance.

Rhiannon: I am in, with bells on.

Nicky: If you can be at MI6 headquarters by 10:00 am, we will coordinate the raid with you.

We will also ensure you are provided with the kind of material you need to be prepared for such an adventure.

Rhiannon: Most kind of you, Nicky. 10:00 am Thursday. Have a good day.

Nicky: Ladies, we shall be Stuffy Shirts plus one.

Emily: Excellent news.

Harriet: Excellent news, indeed.

The Flowers From The Market Raid

The Stuffy Shirts travelled together in the same MI6 vehicle to the Flowers From The Market warehouse. There was little conversation in the vehicle and none from Rhiannon. She seemed more than a little focussed.

Several MI6 teams breached the Flowers From The Market warehouse. The Stuffy Shirts went in through the front door, with Nicky Parsons taking the lead.

Rounding up and securing the trouble making communists was not a difficult task. The raid seemed to have confused them.

Rhiannon waited until they were all secured, then she went to work She lined them up, resplendent in their handcuffs, and had a chat with them.

Rhiannon: Never threaten my life or my business.

She then shot each of them in their left knee.

Nicky Parsons: You communists have a choice. You can come with me and cooperate fully with MI6 or I will leave you here and my friend will finish her work.

A chorus of “MI6" greeted Nicky Parsons.

Nicky Parsons: MI6 has the kind of hospitality you communists are going to learn to enjoy.

The new Flowers From The Market friends of MI6 were promptly put in MI6 motor vehicles and taken to MI6 headquarters.

Emily: You know what this means?

Harriet: It is time for tea and muffins.

Nicky: Join us for tea and muffins, Rhiannon.

Rhiannon: I would like to stop in at Floraville and tell them of the good news.

Nicky: No problems.

The quick stop at Floraville saw Rhiannon greet both Mrs Hubbard and Penelope Styles alone in the store. Rhiannon walked up to Mrs Hubbard and kissed her on her cheek.

Rhiannon: Thank you, Mrs Hubbard. We just took care of the problem with Flowers From The Market and your help was valuable. My friends tell me the business can return to normal.

Mrs Hubbard: That is good news, Rhiannon.

Rhiannon: I will now leave you ladies to return to your business and I will return to mine.

Mrs Hubbard and Penelope Styles: Thank you, Rhiannon.

Rhiannon then returned to The Stuffy Shirts and they all subsequently undertook the important business of tea and muffins. 

A New Dawn, A New Day

Rhiannon and M2 were out socialising. They walked past a coin-operated photograph booth.

Rhiannon stopped and got M2 to enter the booth with her. Photographs of them kissing were taken. Shortly thereafter Rhiannon sent one of the photographs to Nicky Parsons at MI6 headquarters, accompanied by a note:

“Someday My Prince Will Come, Nicky. Someday My Prince Will Come.”

When Nicky Parsons opened her mail and saw the photograph and note, she said with a smile:

“Someday Your Prince Will Come, Rhiannon. Someday Your Prince Will Come.”

Nicky put that mail in her drawer, for safe-keeping.

Mr Loan Shark Goes Legitimate

Happily for Rhiannon her extra-curricular activities were enjoying a quiet period. The life of an ordinary record store girl suited her just fine. She decided to use her lunch break at the record store to visit Mr Loan Shark.

As Rhiannon walked into the premises of Mr Loan Shark, she greeted him, Mr Goon and Mr Brunette Criminal.

Rhiannon: “Good afternoon, gentlemen. I have some news for you. With the guidance of Mr Loan Shark, Mr Goon and Mr Brunette Criminal will operate a legitimate private investigation firm. That legitimate private investigation business will give you a legitimate reason to maintain the skills I need you to have as part of my network. Those skills will also be very useful in this loan shark business. If you need a licence to operate, you will get one. If you need to do a course to qualify, you will do that course. You are being given the option of a better, legitimate life and you will do the necessary work to secure that option.

“That legitimate private investigation business is good community public relations for me and it will generate legitimate income for me. That will help me fund the expenses I incur in doing the extra-curricular work that I do. Work that has directly benefited all of you.

“In part, the legitimate private investigation business could benefit from the intelligence my network acquires and it may also be a source of intelligence for me and my network. 

“Think carefully, Mr Loan Shark. Do you think you could branch out into the legitimate business of private investigation?”

Mr Loan Shark: This is quite a surprise, Miss Rhiannon. I had never really thought of it before, but I can now see the benefits of it. I think I could branch out as you have suggested and provide guidance to Mr Goon and Mr Brunette Criminal.

Rhiannon: Mr Goon, Are you prepared to take part in this legitimate venture and give some respectability to this setup? It has obvious benefits for you.

Mr Goon: Yes, Miss Rhiannon. I am prepared to be a part of the proposed legitimate private investigations business, and do the qualification work, if necessary.

Rhiannon: Mr Brunette Criminal, Are you prepared to join your colleagues in the proposed legitimate venture?

Mr Brunette Criminal: Yes, Miss Rhiannon.

Rhiannon: Mr Loan Shark, You run this loan shark business. I do not need to manage the transition to the private investigation business for you. You are quite capable of doing that. You do not need to rush, but equally I do not expect you to dawdle.

I have to get back to the record shop. You can keep me updated with your progress.

Good luck, chaps.”

As Rhiannon left the loan shark premises to return to the record shop, a chorus of “Thank you, Miss Rhiannon” followed her.

The Community Security Fund Bank Account

The Bank Accountant was in conversation with the owner of the neighbourhood supermarket, a customer of the Bank.

Supermarket Owner: “Mr Accountant, I understand you had some excitement here recently and it was foiled very effectively by the young lady in the record shop. I also understand it was not the first time she has helped out this community in dangerous circumstances. Her good and dangerous work should not go unrewarded.

“Were you to set up a Community Security Fund Account for the Record Shop young lady, in recognition of her service to the community and a reward for effectively anonymous acts of bravery, the community would be able to contribute to the bank account, as a way of thanking her for her efforts. I would be prepared to contribute to such an account via my supermarket business.

Bank Accountant: That is an interesting proposal, Mr Supermarket Owner. I also understand our record shop lady is giving a couple of criminals a chance at a better life via a legitimate Private Investigation Firm with which she is connected.

Supermarket Owner: That seems to strengthen the argument for the Bank to set up the Community Security Fund Account I proposed for Miss Record Shop. I am sure you can authorise the establishment of such an account.

Bank Accountant: You have convinced me, Mr Supermarket Owner. I will let you know when the account is set up and available to receive contributions. I think it would be a good idea if you were present when I told Miss Record Shop the account has been established.

Supermarket Owner: As you wish, Mr Accountant.

The Famous Five and MI6

A couple of weeks after the Someday My Prince Will Come mail episode, Nicky Parsons hosted a casual Famous Five team meeting in her office. M1 made an interesting contribution.

M1: “I am on record as saying I misjudged Rhiannon. I have not changed my mind in respect of that assessment of her. As Rhiannon The Tea Drinker, she was an unpaid MI6 informant, but that relationship ended by agreement because her utility diminished.

“I propose reigniting the relationship with Rhiannon The Ordinary Record Shop Girl, based on her proven new skills and attitude. She should not do the good work she does now and not get paid for it. Rhiannon has much greater utility to MI6 now and she warrants being retained for Black Operations.

Emily: That is certainly a confronting proposal.

Harriet: And not without merit.

Nicky: Rhiannon is still keen to keep in touch with us and invite us to help her.

Nicky noticed the Boss walking past her office. She went outside, gently grabbed him and redirected him to her office.

Nicky: “Welcome to a closed door team meeting of The Famous Five, Boss. I have a proposal for you.

I (we) want you to authorise the retention of Rhiannon The Ordinary Record Shop Girl by MI6 for Black Operations.”

A chorus of “Yes” from the Famous Five accompanied the request by Nicky Parsons.

Boss: The Someday My Prince Will Come, lady?

Nicky: Yes.

Boss: Is this the knee shot lady?

Nicky: Yes.

Boss: You all support this?

The Famous Five: Yes.

Boss: Was this your idea, M2?

M1: It was my idea.

Boss: Sometimes I wonder if there is much difference between black operations and some of what you five do.

Remind me again. You all support this?

The Famous Five: Yes.

Boss: Strange as it may seem, there is a sort of paperwork for this. I will let Nicky and Harriet take care of it. Your request is granted.

The Famous Five: Thank You.

Boss: May I return to my office now?

Nicky (chuckling): Yes, Sir. Thank you.

As The Boss left to return to his office he said: “Enjoy your day, agents.”

The Community Security Fund Account and Financial Advice

Rhiannon was at the bank in completely uncontroversial circumstances doing the routine banking for the record shop. A bank staffer noticed her presence and immediately notified the Bank Accountant, who was in conversation in his office with Mr Supermarket Owner.

The Staffer to the Accountant: Sir, You asked to be notified whenever the lady from the Record Shop was in the bank. She is here now.

Bank Accountant: Excellent. Thank you, young man. I will go and see her.

By this time Rhiannon was at a teller making her deposit for the record shop.

Bank Accountant: Miss would you mind coming to my office when your business with the teller is done. I have some news for you.

Rhiannon: OK.

Teller: She can go now. We are all done.

Bank Accountant: Could you bring her to my office, please.

The Bank Accountant returned to his office and almost immediately Rhiannon arrived with the teller.

Bank Accountant: “Please have a seat. This is Mr Supermarket Owner. He is part of the news. We want to thank you for the good work you did here recently in dealing with the troublemakers in the bank.

“Mr Supermarket Owner said your efforts should not go unrewarded. Not just your efforts here, but your efforts in the community in general. Mr Supermarket Owner suggested the bank set up a Community Security Fund Account for you, where members of the community might make contributions to assist you and ensure that the expenses you incur in the work you do are not borne by you alone and as an indication of gratitude for the work you do.

“His argument was not only persuasive, it was compelling. Accordingly the bank is prepared to establish a Community Security Fund Account for you. You would control the account and we have no need to know how you spend the money. We would like you not to waste the money. That is not said as an insult, but rather as a demonstration of our concern for your welfare.

“The offer of the establishment of a Community Security Fund Account for you is accompanied by a suggestion that you consult and perhaps work with a financial adviser or a money man, as some people call them. I have the details of a money man we think would be a good fit for you.

“Mr Phineas Rothsenberry is a quiet unassuming man and a meticulous financial advisor. He operates his practice out of a small office above a haberdashery not far from here. His job is to manage the money, not to ask where it comes from. His role would be to ensure your Community Security Fund Account was kept impeccably, that all deposits were properly recorded, and that your relevant expenditure was meticulously documented.

“By dealing with Mr Rothsenberry, you would be at arm's length from the bank, me and Mr Supermarket Owner and how you dealt with the Community Security Fund Account would be entirely your business.

“I also understand you may have an interest in a Private Investigation business. Mr Rothsenberry may also be able to help you with the finances of that business, should that be your wish.”

Rhiannon: I am very grateful to you gentlemen. Your offer is kind and thoughtful. I am inclined to accept your offer, both of the bank account and of the financial adviser.

Bank Accountant: I will make arrangements for the Community Security Fund Account to be established in respect of you. When it is available, I will contact you. I will also contact Mr Phineas Rothsenberry to let him know we have recommended you consult him in respect of the account.

Rhiannon: Thank you, gentlemen. I had better get back to the record shop.

The Florist

Rhiannon organised a meeting with the financial advisor, Mr Phineas Rothsenberry.

Rhiannon: “Mr Rothsenberry, my attendance here is a consequence of a meeting I had with the Bank Accountant and his client Mr Supermarket Owner. They were involved in the establishment of a Community Security Fund Account at the bank for my benefit. They suggested I consult you to manage that account and my other financial affairs. I also have a business proposal to discuss, so with this meeting we can see if this relationship can work for us.

“A brief personal history seems apposite. I used to be a Tea Drinker and work at The Tea Drinkers Club. I reached a stage where I could no longer bring myself to do that kind of work, so I sought alternate employment. I am now an Ordinary Record Shop Girl and my transition to that new life is complete. My boyfriend is an MI6 agent, so danger has not completely left my life. It is sufficient to say I have learned some self defence skills.

“In my new life as an Ordinary Record Shop Girl an incident occurred which led me to meet Mr Loan Shark. He helped me deal with a problem that confronted my new employer. A consequence of that interaction with Mr Loan Shark is that I have also established a Private Investigation Firm and his two employees form that legitimate business under his guidance.

“The Private Investigation Firm provides his employees with an opportunity for employment in a legitimate business, rather than the shady underworld. Part of the inspiration for the establishment of the Community Security Fund Account was the employment of those two chaps in the Private Investigation Firm. You managing the financial affairs of that Private Investigation Firm would also be part of my proposed relationship with you.

“And now to the business proposal. It is informed by the Private Investigation Firm. I propose that a former work colleague from The Tea Drinkers Club run a florist business for me. It is sufficient if I identify this lass as Miss Begging Escort and the description is not an insult.

"Miss Begging Escort would cease working as a Tea Drinker and ultimately run an ordinary level florist, which would blend in with the surrounding businesses.

“At the start the business would employ an experienced lead florist, who correctly believes they are simply being hired to run the new shop and who is looking towards retirement. The experienced florist could teach Miss Begging Escort the necessary expertise. She would groom Miss Begging Escort to take over from her.

“That business model has some comparison to the record shop that employs me. Part of your job would be to find an appropriate florist business to fit those criteria. I will deal with the transition of Miss Begging Escort from her current vocation to her new one.

“The private investigators delivering flowers has some attraction for both their businesses. Of course, that is a small part of the private investigation business, but the businesses helping each other out is a deliberate strategy. It seems to me to offer a useful cover for their work.

“The Private Investigation Firm had the luxury of Mr Loan Shark overseeing the running of the business. The florist presents a different challenge. I propose that you take on the business supervisor role.”

Rothsenberry: “It is hard to think of an introduction to a prospective client that compares with yours. Managing your financial affairs is a challenge I am happy to embrace and that includes the florist business. I will look for a florist business for you and also an appropriate lead florist. I like your business endeavour and I think we can do business.”

Rhiannon: Thank you. I will now share my proposal with Miss Begging Escort. We can keep each other informed as to our progress. Have a good day, Mr Rothsenberry.

Miss Begging Escort and The Florist Proposal

Rhiannon telephoned Miss Begging Escort: I have a proposal I want to discuss with you. The venue is the café across the road from the record shop.

Miss Begging Escort: I will be there in 30 minutes.

Once they were settled in the café, Rhiannon outlined the florist business proposal and Mr Phineas Rothsenberry to Miss Begging Escort.

Rhiannon: It is a new life for you and a new business for me. I do not want either to fail. Say good-bye to tea drinking and take this opportunity. It will not be easy, but the effort will be worth it and support will be around you.

Miss Begging Escort: Whatever I was expecting to hear from you, this was not it. Tea drinking offers no future. This is an opportunity I did not expect to see. I accept your offer and I will do my best to make it work, for both of us.

Rhiannon: Excellent. I will let you know when the florist business becomes a reality. Until then, do not discuss it with anyone.

Miss Begging Escort: OK.

Progress In Floraville

About 10 days later, Mr Phineas Rothsenberry telephoned Rhiannon: I have found you a florist business that seems a good target to purchase and I have also found an experienced florist, Mrs Maxine Hubbard, who is prepared to work with your proposal of training Miss Begging Escort.

Rhiannon: Thank you. I will meet with Mrs Maxine Hubbard and have a discussion with her.

That discussion took place in the café across the road from the record shop. Rhiannon told Mrs Maxine Hubbard about her own transition from Tea Drinker to Ordinary Record Shop Girl and how she wants to offer a similar opportunity to Miss Begging Escort. The Private Investigation firm was further evidence of her reformation business strategy.

Mrs Maxine Hubbard told Rhiannon she was prepared to get on board.

Rhiannon then telephoned Mr Loan Shark: “Come to the café across the road from the record shop now and bring your two employees with you. I have a new business venture to discuss.”

Mr Loan Shark: We will be there in fifteen (15) minutes.

Upon their arrival Rhiannon conducted introductions.

Rhiannon: “Gentlemen, Mrs Maxine Hubbard will be running Floraville, my new business venture, a florist, and part of your duties will now include conducting flower deliveries for that business, as required. It should not take you too long to see how the florist business can assist your business. I am not interested in this business failing, so do not let me down. The lass you know as Miss Begging Escort will be working with Mrs Hubbard. An exchange of contact details seems appropriate.

“I will let Miss Begging Escort know of these developments.

Are there any questions?”

There were no questions.

Rhiannon: Thank you for your attendance everyone. I now have to leave.

Rhiannon then telephoned Mr Phineas Rothsenberry: Everyone is on board for the florist business. We can now make it happen.

Rhiannon then telephoned Miss Begging Escort: Miss Penelope Styles, Come and have dinner with me at the Minor Key Café, your new life as a florist is soon to begin.

Penelope Styles: As she burst into tears, “Thank you. I will be there in about 30 minutes.”